|Teaching children to fish|
I realized that the crying that occurs when they fall is more of a reaction to Mom and Dad's fright in their voice. The loud scream, cry, followed by Are-you-all-right-poor-babys contributed to the shock of the fall. This was later confirmed when I officiated one of the little known high school basketball teams unless you have a family member who is deaf or blind. It is the Florida School of Deaf and Blind in St. Augustine Florida. It is where the infamous Ray Charles attended. Not only do the basketball players for the FSD&B school not stop playing when we blow our whistles, they seldom cried when they fell down. They fouled a lot and they didn't stop playing when they were fouled hard. And I mean pushed to the ground hard. I connected the dots and had an epiphany, they never heard their parents "poor-babys" so they were never conditioned to cry when they fall. As a result, they were stronger for it. We actually would have to protect the opposing teams as the FSD&B kids thought everyone was like they were and consequently didn't realize their strength.
I continued this style of learning throughout my children's lives. I was the "mean" Mom they would say. I finally figured out they meant strict. I wouldn't give them anything freely, I made them earn an allowance. I would list chores I needed done on the refrigerator and they could pick and choose each chore with the set dollar amount that was non-negotiable. They learned to look for the highest paying job (which corresponded with the most sweat and longest time to complete) and would fight over those. Once you have earned your money, there is something about a sense of accomplishment you feel. Don't get me wrong I love free things but doing the right thing sometimes means learning something new you didn't think you could do.
|Strawberry "Love" Jam|
“The jelly - the jam and the marmalade,
And the cherry-and quince-"preserves" she made!
And the sweet-sour pickles of peach and pear,
With cinnamon in 'em, and all things rare! -
And the more we ate was the more to spare,
Out to old Aunt Mary's! Ah!”