Nothing Finer than Living in North Caroliner

Nothing Finer than Living in North Caroliner
Blue Ridge Smoky Mountains

Friday, May 6, 2011

Day 113 - The Insurance of Windows and Assurance of Mirrors

I sit with a twenty year old in my Windows 7 class.  His name is "TB."  He at times has really gotten on all of our nerves.  There are five us who also sit in the front row with TB and we just all happen to be thirty or older.  TB has that way of speaking like an expert when it's clear that he may not know exactly what he's talking about.  Add to the "know-it-all" attitude, the fact that he comes across as condescending really gets under all of our skins.  He has at time butted into a classmates conversation to which she put him in his place and told him, "This is an A-B conversation, C your way out of it."  He has told another classmate that [WARNING: geek speak coming] that a USB flash drive doesn't have NTFS protections but in fact some do.  Another one of my classmates  brought in a flash drive that had NTFS to prove it to him.  He comes to class sporadically and more not than often.  He's the younger generation that thinks because they were born with a silver motherboard in their mouths, that they can confuse you with "their" facts.

I recently heard a great is entitled to their own opinions but NOT to their own facts.  The logic goes that their facts are not facts at all when they can't substantiate them.  I also like the saying that happens when two people start to debate politics and when it becomes clear that the losing side of the debate is in denial, we say "they can't be confused by the facts." 

The fact is that TB is immature and quick to judge.  I know another twenty year old, Nate, who is my son's best friend.   He too has this attitude that "nothing can happen to me."  This is not the only thing that these two twenty year olds have in common.  Within the last two weeks, both of these young men have lost their fathers.  TB's father just checked out of the Hotel of Life while out on the golf course.  I thought this was just awful.  And as awful as this is, Nate's fathers death was even more horrific.  Nate's father shot himself in the head in front of Nate and died in Nate's arms.  My heart goes out to both of these young men. 

TB invited me to his father's wake.  I have to be honest and admit that I really haven't found that TB was the nicest person on earth, but I felt the right thing to do would be to go to support TB during this time.  I looked at it as an opportunity to show him that we are more than just classmates to him.  I was the first one there as I had to go early in order to make it to class that night.  He was really appreciative and I saw a different side of him that night.  This is what happens when we are young, immature and immortal.  We think nothing will happen to us and it only happens to other people. I too thought this until some major events took place in my life.  First my best friend died in a car accident at the age of sixteen, the roof of my house blew off and we were forced to move in with a co-worker of my mother, and my cousin was murdered and her sister, also my cousin died in a car accident all these events occurred before I was twenty-five.  These are the times that have defined my dependence on insurance.

I learned through these times that if something could happen, it probably would happen to me.  So as a precaution in order to control the uncontrollable, I bought insurance.  It really has helped me in the times I've needed it. As a result, I'm probably overinsured.  I had insurance for my car, for my health, for my teeth, for my life, for accident disability and for cancer.  Up until last month these were up to date.  Since COBRA federal subsidies have stopped I can't afford the $465/month payment on the $1100 monthly income and as a result don't have health and dental insurance anymore.  I'm not sure whether I can maintain the rest of the insurance either. I'm a little worried to tell you the truth about getting sick.  Dying doesn't bother me as much as getting sick, because I wouldn't be here to worry about it.

I've never had the father that these young men have had.  I can't imagine what they are going through or how this will ultimately define them. In a sense, fathers ARE the insurance that just makes us "feel" safe.  Fathers make us feel "invincible."  The only real assurance we have is that death will ultimately fall upon all of us, until that time insurance can help the family cope as they heal emotionally.  TB and Nate, may the peace of God be with you and please learn from this that things happen in life we can't explain until we're far enough down the road to be looking in the rearview mirror.  If we could only take a class that was like our Windows 7 class that TB and I are in.  A class that prepares us for such tragic events, perhaps we'd call it Rearview Mirrors 101.

My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass"; "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys" ~ Harmon Killebrew (American Baseball Player, b.1936)

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